*TRIGGER WARNING TO FORMER RA’S, RD’S, AND SLD’S. I MAKE A MENTION OF GAMBLING AND OTHER THINGS SOME MAY CONSIDER BAD*
Hit it, Bruce!
As Santa made his first official appearance of the year at the parade on Thanksgiving morning, Mrs. Longshots and I joked to our menace of a blind dog that he only had a month to get from the naughty list to the nice list. Suddenly, my brain shifted from the debate of the order I would eat my dinner and my football investments to which people on Liberty Twitter would be on the naughty list and who would be on the nice list.
Now if you’re not on Twitter, this is probably going to make zero sense. But you still should be aware that LU Twitter is like a zoo. A zoo where they just let the animals roam freely with zero supervision. A zoo where takes, both good and bad, fly around like seagulls (you put me on the Ark with two seagulls, zero seagulls would have made it out alive). A zoo where the animals often get into fights with other animals from rival zoos. Heaven forbid you don’t include Liberty in a list? The zoo animals will let you have it.
AP top 25? A stupid Big Game Boomer tweet? Which schools are closest to an Olive Garden? If it doesn’t have LU at the top, the zoo animals will riot.
So I reached out to my connection in the North Pole (did track in high school with Mrs. Clause’s great nephew) to get the breakdown of who from Liberty Twitter is firmly on the nice list and who has some work to do before the 25th of December.
Nice List
Jeremiah Flinchum
@theotherjerryLU
This was an absolute slam dunk. Jerry is maybe the nicest guy in the world. While the zoo animals are out running amuck and causing a scene Jerry is making friends with rival fans, opposing teams, and everyone else in between. He was actually the first person I met from Liberty Twitter when I was in Nashville for a bachelor party (Heads up as someone who has been to 20+ of them. Don’t go to Nashville. Been there three times. Too crowded).
I digress. If Coach Chadwell asked Jerry to pull a Connor Stallions (allegedly) and record some other team’s game I think Jerry would do it, but then apologize right away to the opposing fans and turn himself in. We love him, the opposing fans love him, shoo in for the nice list.
Kathy Hudson
@redhedtchr
Ms. Kathy is a SAINT. I’m not super up to date on my theology and have no idea who handles sainthood but Kathy Hudson, who taught KINDERGARTEN, is a saint. She is out here fanning the flames every game from her Virginia home or traveling on the road to see the team. She’s been a fan way before virtually all of us and even through the ups and downs she remains in full voice. I got to meet her at the Wake Forest game and she was even nicer in-person than she was online. Top of the nice list!
Anyone who donated to Flames Rising NIL Collective
@FlamesRising_
Tis the season of giving (and not silly szn)! Santa gives to those who give first. Liberty Athletics has climbed to new heights and you can’t ignore the impact that NIL has had both in Lynchburg and across the country. With the transfer portal opening up shortly now is as good a time as any to make a donation.
Cody Mumauu
@Mumau55
Everyone loves Cody, who is one half of the Bucket Hat Brothers Tailgate, and for a variety of reasons. He’s extremely well-spoken on Twitter and is always there to offer a solid opinion or to invite someone new to his tailgate. Meeting him in person a couple of times this season year sealed the deal. The thing is, I’m convinced Cody would take the presents he got from being on the nice list and give them all to someone else.
Naughty List
Caleb Wynn
Too many Twitter accounts to name
Easy one. He’s a walking liability. If anyone was going to be a Connor Stallions and break all of the rules for the good of the program it’s going to be Caleb. Since he showed up on LU Twitter during last years LTBC his escapades have been seen by all.
To the surprise of no one, he got a ticket on the way to the WKU game. He is turning 21 while he’s in Arizona for the Fiesta Bowl. I’ve also been to Scottsdale, and that town gets after it. Caleb in Old Town for his 21st will be must-watch/avoid television.
JB’s Trap Phone and Colin Porter (Alpha Male)
These two are a hoot. It would get dull if everyone on Liberty Twitter were the same. Luckily we have these two to comment on just about everything, giving the view from a current student’s perspective. Do they cross the line? Sure! But they’ve come a long way. If you two need someone to sign your CSER paperwork you just call up Uncle Longshots and I’ll take care of you.
Anyone who has colleges in their bio that they didn’t attend.
(Read that again before everyone gets mad online. That you DIDN’T attend)
I don’t care that your grandfather went to some ACC school or your dad roots for a B12 school. You don’t look fully committed. You know who doesn’t like that? Santa.
And before someone goes “But RLS you have FDU in your bio!” Yes, I have a Masters Degree from there and they beat Purdue in the biggest upset in March Madness history. Carry on.
JC “CP0 Stan
@JDizzyCreel
I don’t hate many things in this life. I hate Penn State. I hate coconut-flavored anything. I hate the fact that Dave Matthews Band put out the album Everyday when the Lillywhite Sessions were borderline perfection. Last but not least, I hate my Earth Science 220 professor.
But the amount of hate I have doesn’t equal JC’s hate towards the CUSA. I thought he was going to have to get an order of protection from the AllFor1 guy online. Almost have to respect the troll game he has anytime something happens. His spine zones too when something does happen well is world-class. You can’t be that much of a hater and make it on the nice list. I don’t make the rules.
